Do good-looking guys get more women? Looks vs. skill in attraction

It’s popular to think that women’s attraction comes down to looks. If a guy is tall and good-looking, he’s got it made.

But then why do we often see average or below-average looking guys getting really hot girls?

The assumption is that attraction works the same for men and women. Since looks are the most important thing for a man, they think the same is true for women.

But the vast majority of porn photos and videos–a completely visual medium–depict women for the pleasure of men. And porn is mostly consumed by men, not women.

Meanwhile, romance novels (which are often porn put to paper), are the largest segment of the book industry. And they are consumed overwhelmingly by women.

A male’s physical looks cannot be that arousing to women.

Sexuality for women is mostly about the feelings generated by the man. Yes, certain images and appearances can create more interest for her.

But just seeing a photo of a handsome man does not, by itself, make her want to sleep with that man. She needs to interact with him in real life.

But for men, just seeing an image of a woman is enough for him to want sex.

Since many prominent PUAs are tall, good-looking guys, it’s easy for “lookists” to assume that their success just comes from looks and height.

Here are some examples:


Mystery (in the center)

Mystery of the Mystery method

David Wygant

David Wygant

Paul Janka

Paul Janka

Steve Jabba

Steve Jabba

But for every tall and good-looking PUA, there is at least one other PUA who is not tall, or not that good-looking, or both:


Justin Wayne

Justin Wayne

Vince Kelvin

Vince Kelvin

Johnny Wolf

Johnny Wolf

Neil Strauss

Neil Strauss

And these are just professional PUAs.

We can also look at celebrities and other prominent men who are short, unattractive face/ body, or both:

Dennis Kucinich, former member of the US House of Representatives, and his wife Elizabeth:

Dennis and Elizabeth KucinichDennis Kucinich and wife Elizabeth

Salman Rushdie, prominent author, and former wife, model/ actress Padma Lakshmi:

salman rushdie and padma lakshmisalman rushdie and padma lakshmi

Seth Green (5’4″) with his girlfriend/wife actress Clare Grant:

seth green and clare grant

seth green and clare grantAnd there are countless more examples, including Lil Wayne (Lil Wayne again), Tom Cruise, Russell Simmons (who has dated some of the most beautiful women you’ve ever seen, despite looking as beautiful as… well… Dennis Kucinich), and the guys from Jersey Shore.

When faced with this evidence, many people will then say “well, these guys are rich and famous, so that compensates for their physical shortcomings.”

But what about guys like Neil Strauss, who were great with women for a long time before being prominent/ well-known?

If these women are dating actors and celebrities, it means they are moving in high-status circles. So they are meeting plenty of other powerful men, including better-looking actors, models, musicians and others.

They have options, but they chose the less physically attractive men.

Being good-looking is cool. But game, conversation skills, personality, chemistry and sexual connection are usually more important.


WDISTH-ver2-coverCheck out “What Do I Say to Her?
The Simple Guide to Conversation & Flirting”

5 thoughts on “Do good-looking guys get more women? Looks vs. skill in attraction

    • Yeah that’s him in the hat with the two girls.

      Seeing the pictures of all these guys really brings the point home, lol.

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