Conversation with women does not have to be boring
Here’s the thing: a conversation with a girl is only boring if you allow it be boring. You’re in the driver’s seat. You’re the leader. Ask different questions, make different statements, and suddenly it’s a totally different vibe.
Good conversation is very hard to come by, so if you can do this, you will find women begging to stay with you.
There are 3 huge factors that lead to boring conversations with women:
First, being inhibited and not expressing yourself fully
I was certainly like this for a long time and still occasionally slip back into it. As I discuss in my book “The Introvert Approach,” when we aren’t comfortable expressing ourselves genuinely, we fall back on common, standard methods of communication that are universal in society.
So we end up talking about things that are normal and predictable.
This creates a boring conversation because both you and the girl have had this same conversation countless times with other people. It’s a conversation that is not unique to you or her, you are just copying the standard, default conversation.
But when you express yourself fully and without hesitation, it’s different. You are having a real, genuine, unique interaction. The two of you have never met, so there is no chance this conversation has happened before.
Second, you are not listening to her
It seems simple, but true listening is actually one of the most powerful things you can develop to improve your attraction and seduction skills. She’s giving you tons of interesting topics and themes when she speaks to you.
Most guys are too busy worrying about what to say next to actually listen and process what she’s saying. If they did, they would be able to ask good questions, and develop chemistry with her.
Third, you don’t want to take risks
You don’t want to be “rejected.” An interesting conversation requires you to get out there and say something or do something unusual. Expressing yourself and saying what’s on your mind, even if that means disagreeing with her, is risky and ballsy. And it also makes the conversation more memorable.
But when you try to keep a normal, “decent” conversation going, you shoot yourself in the foot and lock yourself into boring zone. You may be able to hold a lot of girls’ attention, but you aren’t getting anywhere with dating or sex because you aren’t breaking through that mold.
“Trying” to have a normal conversation with a girl is very outcome-dependent. You basically just want her to stick around and keep talking to you. So you stay talking about normal, predictable, safe, non-polarizing topics.
But to get anywhere with women, you have to accept that some women will not like you, some will not be compatible or are not looking for the same things. Understand that, and then do and say things that risk turning some women away, while keeping the ones who like it.